@import url('http:// I Passed....but The Bar Exam is Still a Bitch: For Anyone Else Who Still Hasn't Passed the Bar....
I Passed....but The Bar Exam is Still a Bitch
I took the Bar Exam more than once, several times actually, and lived to tell the tale....retakers take heart...the bar is a bitch...but not impossible...
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
For Anyone Else Who Still Hasn't Passed the Bar....
I want to say a little something for anyone else who has failed the bar exam.....mainly because I've failed it myself.....(many times, but please don't let that freak you out--please read the blog, it is highly unlikely you have circumstances as unusual as mine).

....and no.....I haven't passed it yet.....but I know I will....because I know I won't quit trying.

I'm sorry you've failed.....I understand how you feel....I understand that you can't sleep at night....I understand that you feel ok until you wake up and remember again that you've failed and you feel sick all over again......that you probably can't eat....that you can't face the people that you love...that you really can't face people you fucking hate....and that you feel like you want to hide from the world.....I know how hopeless you feel....I know how crushed you feel.....

I promise that eventually the feelings fade....I've pushed through them myself and actually smile these days... but I've been dealing with all this for quite a while obviously....and I don't wish that for any of you...but I want you to at least know you aren't alone with these kinds of feelings.... (of course maybe I was alone in feeling this way---in which case, chalk me up to being a basket case and caveat emptor in blog reading, such and so forth)

We who are groomed to be the absolute best are not much accustomed to failure....and it is brutal when we fail.....oh god....it is so very brutal.....

But.....having been where you've been.....and having failed more than once (and survived)....I've realized that self worth really has nothing to do with this test....I've found that I'm ok with the failure and I don't fear it so much any more.....

Being fearless is a good thing....I promise....sometimes we have to use the things we are given....
posted by Bar Bitch @ 9:41 AM  
8 Comments:
  • At 3:30 PM, September 24, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm so sorry to hear your news, I was really looking forward to a different result. I did pass but my close friend and study partner did not so it was bittersweet. But I admire your determination and hope that I can convince him to keep going as well. I'll be waiting to say congrats to both of you in Feb!

     
  • At 3:59 PM, September 24, 2006, Anonymous failed too said…

    Do you plan on studying differently this time around?????

     
  • At 5:02 PM, September 24, 2006, Blogger kathleen said…

    This is a great blog site and I so glad I found it! For a change, I could smile about my own feelings of do it again until it is done.

    I have a positive attitude, work in court every day handling cases, and I know I can practice law - I will conquer the exam. I would like advice on better material for 2/2007 Florida.

    Like yourself, I have endured many obstacles. My fiance, his mother and our dog - all died from cancer after graduation from law school. None of knew about the cancer in each case until it was too late. I was devastated and I walked away from the bar exam. I could not get the nightmares out of my head and guilt about studying all those years. I learned how to live again(went to a grief specialist and a test anxiety specialist) and a few years later back to the exam. I also met a great guy, remarried, and he is presently Army deployed.

    So while sitting for bar exams, I have worked full time by day and study at night. I also sat for the Real Estate Exam, passed the school exam and getting ready to sit for the State exam. Since I do not yet have my bar license, the part time rental properties we own make up for the lower salary I make as a law clerk for a government agency. That's OK - at least I have a great job.

    My heart goes out to those who have passed and no work or not passed and work in jobs they hate. I have heard people make snide comments that they would "die" if they did not pass and I always respond as follows - I have cared for loved ones and seen them die on life support battled the nightmares and won. Nothing can possibly make me want to die, especially a test!!!!

    I thank God everyday for what I have.

    Here is my frustration > Florida changed the score requirements from 131 to 136. That may not sound like much but that is my obstacle. I would have passed under the old requirement of 131. I have hit the 131-135 range. My question now is what do I do to make my property and contract MBE question scores higer to hit 136?

    I have tried BrBri, PMBR and Micromash. I am considering a whole new program since these did not work effectively for me. Is there a suggestion from anyone who is retaking the bar or from others who have managed to get over this hurdle?

    If so I would love to hear from you or someone who knows someone who has finally hit that pot of gold!

    In the meanwhile, I would love to also chat with others who are dealing with our exam challenges.

    Love and peace to all - Kathy

     
  • At 5:03 PM, September 24, 2006, Blogger kathleen said…

    Live, love and enjoy life to the fullest.

     
  • At 4:19 PM, September 25, 2006, Blogger Bar Bitch said…

    To Failed too...

    Only thing I'm going to do any differently is a whole boat load more of MBE's....

    I probably did about 200 per subject which gave me a fairly substantial return for my investment....I have had one higher MBE score in the past however...and it was due to a sick number of MBE practice questions....that is the way my brain works sadly....

    As far as the essays go...it would seem that I just can't break the ceiling...I score consistently...mainly 5's / 6's but always one low score that does me in I guess...I'm just not sure that I can prepare any more thoroughly or much differently...it seems to be a question of luck whether they ask the "right" questions for me...

    I'd rather place my bets on the MBE because I'm so close to being in the money...

     
  • At 4:21 PM, September 25, 2006, Blogger Bar Bitch said…

    To Kathy....

    You get a whole page on the blog...

     
  • At 4:44 PM, November 03, 2006, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I failed for the second time. I did not feel bad until I looked at the pass rate in MA and saw that it was 88%. I felt better when I saw that it was only 35% for second time takers.
    Anyway, I will do a lot more studying this time around and actual practice questions for the essays.
    I am so glad that I found your blog.

     
  • At 12:15 PM, November 05, 2006, Blogger Bar Bitch said…

    Anon...

    Hey, I'm glad you feel better...you keep on trying, people don't do well on the bar for lots of reason's, the trick is to figure out why you didn't...and don't get down about those pass stats, all that matter is your number baby!

     
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